Another life?

I dreamt I woke up in someone else's life. I lived in a small house that only had two rooms and both of them were kitchens full of kitchen cupboards with no sink, cooker, fridge etc. The man I was with was obsessed with watching me cook fried Yorkshire pudding and square sausages which I somehow did on a wooden cupboard. The island in the kitchen kept changing size so I had to get past quickly or it would crush me.  The man I was with kept asking how I could even contemplate getting married when my heart was elsewhere. He said I was no better than a milk bottle and left me outside. 

I saw my family but they walked ahead and didn't wait for me. I got delayed because I accidentally had a cow magnet in my clothes and small cows (with sheep's faces) kept getting in my way.  

I tried to run to catch up but I couldn't, so I sat on the grass and realised I could slide down very easily. I overtook my sister and got to the bottom just ahead of everyone else.  I announced I loved hills and wanted one for Christmas.  A random woman with a swimming costume on and hairy knees, holding a baby, announced that Octavia was getting her own wave machine. 

I realised I was in a brand new hospital where everything was painted white. There was a camouflage staircase and bewitched vending machines. I tried to leave but a knitted receptionist explained there was nowhere to leave to. This was my whole world but  I had got there too soon and they hadn't finished decorating :-/ 

Weird house

I dreamt I lived in a three storey house and the moon moved in to the top floor. I tried to keep the house tidy but the top floor was always a terrible mess because the moon collected pieces of multi coloured A4 cardboard.   If I visited the moon, all the rest of the house twisted itself into chaos because of the 'rule of reflection'. 

In the garden, the long faced grey rabbit invited old friends in if they had stale cake and then hid in the greenhouse.   It turned out the greenhouse was a pet factory and had produced two puppies, two kittens, a tiger cub and a phobia of pebbles. :-/ 

Inside the house had become quite weird as all the rooms had become dead relatives and could only be unlocked with memories and emotions. I had trouble with the toilet because it was my great grandma who died before I was born so I had no memories and had to make some out of snakeskin :-/ 

Other worlds

I dreamt....

At the back of my house, which wasn't mine, was a large, spherical, glass room.  At the centre was a column that came halfway up from the floor to the exact centre. A disc resembling a giant LP was fixed at its centre, so as you walked around it, the whole disc tilted and moved.  Independent of this, the whole sphere constantly turned like a revolving restaurant.  As it revolved it passed points where you could exit the sphere, but these doorways were randomly placed and to access them, you had to get the disc at the right level at the right time. 

Each doorway led to the exact same world that you'd just left, but experienced through a different perspective.  There was the door of optimism, the door of paranoia and the door of comparison. 

The whole sphere was powered by butterscotch, melted by the vitriol of a fictitious character.  It was in a glass jug and that day was being kept mainly melted by Tracey Barlow. 

I managed to get through a door and I thought I'd know instantly which world perspective I had, but I had no idea and realised I had to figure it out. 

I was in a chapel and was embarrassed at having no make up on. I became aware it was an open mic chapel but the other performers were singing and doing acrobatics at the same time. Before I could think much about this, my boss approached me to say it was about time they heard me sing but first I had to answer a question. 

The question was just a few seconds of silence and I had to choose a, b or c as the answer.  I chose 'a' which meant I had to go on an open top bus tour of my own prejudices.  However the bus went without me and crashed into a derelict building. 

Suddenly I was back at school. I knew I was there to work but I was equally aware I was back at school. Not only physically there, but back in time too. The feeling of nostalgia and regret was painful and I tried to hide under a staircase, but I became entangled in the colour green and my (other) boss saw me. I apologised for being late and tried to scuttle away but she insisted on telling me things about my life. 

As she told awful stories they took hold and became memories. I ran away and tried to hide in an answering machine but I heard someone singing a song I'd only just written. 

I had to ask how they knew it so I came out to ask. She wouldn't answer but more and more people joined in until it was deafening.  I felt scared and confused and so upset my song had been stolen, so I started throwing Bunsen burners but my hair caught fire. :-/

The wheels on the bus....

I dreamt I was on the top deck of a triple decker bus but the bus's wheels were inside. They were small and red and ran on cream plastic tracks. I watched and as the driver below drove I saw how well he was steering. A wheel came off the tracks so I had to lift it back in. I shouted to the driver to carry on but the bus was jammed and all the alarms went off so I had to get off. The driver had a secret written on a blue card that he kept trying to hide. A woman came who owned the bus and told him off for not building the road first and me for having a messy fringe. 

Suddenly I was on an island and everyone in my family was buying paranoia cake and ice cream.  The woman behind the counter was pushing cucumber cake but I wanted the almond cream and noodle cake with paper bag flavoured ice cream. 

No one in my family would tell me what they were doing but they all had an obsession with carrying garden chairs.  Then three of them attacked me for having my own weather front. 

It turned out I was the producer of a TV show starring Kim Woodburn and it was about to start but I'd left my ice cream and my bladder on the bus so was queuing up to find it inside the smell of old wood. 

The compere started to slag me off so I went towards them but got waylaid by loads of wedding guests showing me boxes of Windows from Amsterdam :-/

Intense!

I dreamt I was with someone whose face kept changing.  We walked from a flat to the beach. It was just crossing a road and I was impressed by how close the sea was, but then a man pointed out to me that my feet were bleeding and said "you came further than you realised."

I noticed it was raining and put an umbrella up but the same man took it off me and said "it's not raining. You're just remembering storms."

So I put on sunglasses, but again the man took them off me, saying "it's not bright enough to hide from the sun.  You just have the dust of too many memories in your eyes, refracting the light.  You should cleanse your eyes"

I realised I needed to get home so myself and my now faceless companion boarded a train.  We were immediately pulling into our station and before the train had even stopped, my companion was on the platform waiting for me but she had left her clothes and handbag on the seat. 

I managed to pick up her coat when the train started to move so I had to jump out, but it was already a few feet from the platform so I ended up on the track, panicking because the train was moving towards me and I'd left my friend's stuff on the train.  

I managed to somehow get my legs out of the way JUST in time as I clambered up on the platform but was sobbing my heart out over my friend's lost belongings.  

Suddenly I was in a hospital bed but all the nurses and doctors were mice. Apparently it worked really well because if they were short staffed they would just breed and produce more mice. 

I had six of them looking after me and as they jointly carried loo rolls around the place, I remember wondering why the NHS hadn't done this before! :-/ 

Musical leaves

The end of this one is sort of lovely....

I dreamt I was in a European city made up entirely of small squares which you couldn't cut across.....you had to walk the entire perimeter of every square to progress. 

I was on a bike and Paul walked...leading a large white horse.  There were two friendly policemen in a foreign looking uniform making sure people walked around the squares properly. 

We were rewarded for being so obedient by being given directions to a secret door which was on two levels at once.  We floated up to a higher level, entering a huge gate at the first floor and coming out at ground level in londerpool which was London and Liverpool at the same time. 

There was a music festival wedding on and all the shops were selling music memorabilia. I saw my reflection and realised I had someone else's body and was wearing a long purple dress which looked completely hideous, with lacy pleated nastiness, was slightly see through in places and was made out of net curtains and dead flowers. 

I suddenly became aware the wedding was off and everyone was rushing to return dresses but I said I couldn't as I'd sweated in mine and melted the seams. 

Instead I watched people spend thousands of pounds on key rings and argue over posters and just wondered at the sanity of the world. 

I suddenly saw the emotions instead of the people. I saw fear and anger and sadness and confusion and desperation.  It made me so sad that I turned into a tree, sucked all the bad stuff up through my roots and turned it into songs which came out as very green leaves. 

No one noticed me much until autumn when the leaves fell and the city was filled with music.....which bizarrely turned into park benches in time for Christmas. :-/

Reflective...

I dreamt that everyone suddenly started telling me everything that was opposite to anything they'd said before. I was bewildered and after several attempts at saying "but you always said......." which were just met with shrugs of indifference, I was getting upset, so started looking for reassurance which I knew was in the building somewhere.

The building was hugely complex with different bits of my life in different eras all in different rooms. It had very long corridors that didn't behave as they should.  They got longer and shorter at the same time and had the same room with the same people in it on both sides at once.

I got keys off 'Vilky' who was a work colleague and was giving them to anyone that wanted to see her new house. The keys however, got me into a beautiful room with an old lady sat in a hospital bed surrounded by millions of flowers and several armed guards!

I explained my predicament and she seemed to understand... which made me feel better. She told me that the answer was within the flowers but before I could ask which ones she was suddenly very far away helping someone else. I could tell that it was all I was going to get, so I left her. I was feeling angry with one particular friend and was determined to challenge her.

Upon arriving in the 'rooms' of my friend (mix of a house, office, shop and studio), she was friendly and smiling and I wondered if I'd got it wrong but when I challenged the earlier statement a door appeared from nowhere and I was locked outside.  I was allowed back in only if I promised not to mention it again.

Once inside I had a feeling of something out of kilter but I couldn't put my finger on it.   Then I realised that the images in the mirrors weren't true reflections. They were somehow slightly different.

Once I focused on them properly I realised the real world was inside the mirrors and the reflections......which were the opposite way around......had escaped into our world and for some reason I was the only person that hadn't got taken into the mirrors.

Luckily I could see that there were controls on an old video player that could control it so I hit stop and rewind....once it got to the start the mirrors smashed and everything was back to normal.....except I realised I was now invisible!

Im back...

....well I never went anywhere really.  My dreams have continued and I've bored Facebook friends almost daily.  But I'm back on here :-)

Here we go then.  

Just had to post this one....

I dreamt that I was in your house. You were repairing something in the kitchen and I was trying to run a bath but it kept filling itself with too much water and pieces of ripped up receipts! 

For some reason I could only talk to you by text but they were delayed, so you thought it was getting better when it was getting worse and vice versa so it was all very confusing.

We decided to go out in the car and we got lost somewhere near Birmingham and decided to check into a hotel. It had a huge foyer. While you gave details at the desk I had to go round to select a 'pick and mix' of room items. 

I picked white sheets, pillows, orange juice, coffee glasses, cutlery, the ability to watch TV and a nice smell. 

While I was choosing though, a trolley carved out of slate fell on me and this black guy ran over to help as I was trapped, but you came over and said it was your job. You were with a prim woman in a flowery dress who showed us to the till. 

You said you'd pay because the hotel owed you money so once all the items went through, the woman gave you money. It was a large note I'd never seen before and I thought it was foreign but you explained it was a seven and a half pound note that could also be used as euros. 

It was large, dark blue, had 7.5 in the corner and had a huge crowd of people pictured on it. You explained to me that it was all the British prime ministers and US presidents there had ever been. 

The note opened up like a book and you started to tell me that many people believed that some prime ministers and presidents throughout history were actually one and the same person. You showed me some examples of large nosed men where it was clear that it was indeed the same person. 

Then we went to the room and the woman came to show us around. She talked incessantly and was lying in the middle of the bed. You were lying next to her and I tried to lie the other side but I didn't have enough room and fell off. 

The woman then felt bad and moved over. You said 'I'm not surprised you fell off. You looked like you were perching on a two year old's bladder'. 

You looked fed up with this woman so took her back to reception. Still talking.  While you were gone, Fiona aka Morag Tyte-Sporran came in and got into bed.  Although in the dream she was called Laura!

I got under the blanket which was flowery. I said I was tired and this was not her room so why was she here? She shrugged and laughed.  I remember saying I didn't think you'd be very impressed to find her there when you got back. 

You got back. You grumped at her then grabbed me by the hand and we went into town and into one of your favourite shops which appeared to sell absolutely everything. 

I looked at fur trimmed colourful gloves but thought the price of 8.59pm too steep. You bought a single music track using the method 'air snatch'. 

We got back to the car and you tried to play your new song but it was the wrong one. You were really upset and cross that you ended up with a song by McFlea!!

You looked properly sad and told me your heart felt cold so I gave you a massive cwtch and told you to let me fix it with love and magic vice versa sweets. 

You said that was better than fixing swingers with surgery and we both had hysterics. I then woke up giggling!!

My capacity to dream has not lessened....

I was in a restaurant that was in two very tall and modern towers. They were mainly made of glass and had mini circular metal balconies all the way down the outside. 

There was no connection between the towers, yet all customers inexplicably moved between the two with ease. 

They were asking for volunteers to climb down the outside without any safety equipment. 

One customer volunteered and climbed down the left tower.  It looked easy and everyone cheered. 

We all walked to the right tower (impossibly) where someone else had volunteered but this is where is all got a bit odd. 

It was compulsory for the volunteer to have their hands painted with water and then they played music which sounded odd. 

It turned out that everything had gone through a dimension converter. The building looked similar except it was like it was made up of pieces that didn't quite fit together properly. It looked vertical and horizontal at the same time. 

The music was meant to be 'Sledgehammer' but if you listened carefully through the dimension converter you could hear that it was actually the theme to the pink panther!

The volunteer set off and managed to stroll down the side whilst eating omelette and chips :-/

Later on Adam took me to his parents' house.  His mother was running a cocktail bar and his father was pacing purposefully with his hands held behind his back. He kept glancing at me and my presence clearly bothered him. 

His mother made Adam and I a lilac cocktail in a traditional cocktail glass but she got confused and put pickled onions in, instead of ice! 

I was told that I had to choose which accident to have to maximise compensation then I had to drive Adam's Dad into the Olympic stadium in a purple glass. 

A fantasy adventure...

It has been AGES I know and I doubt anyone drops by to read this anymore but following a few nights with horrible disturbing dreams, last night’s was so welcome as it was truly wonderful, magical and almost like dreaming a fantasy film!  So I just had to blog it!

I met up with a friend (Arty) on a bridge over a motorway somewhere.  It was grey and cold - the both of us even looked grey.

He had brought with him a bag of sweets that were like a cross between chocolate buttons and those flying saucer sweets with sherbet in the middle.  They glowed too, so when he opened the bag, a wonderful golden light shone out and lit up our faces as we looked down at the contents of the bag.  The contents looked almost like they were semi cartoons and they sparkled like stars.

We each took one of the sweets, put it under each others’ tongues and held hands tightly, as it felt like we were sucked up from earth and transported up into space, the coldness and sensation was unpleasant at first, but as the blue sky changed into darkness and the earth got further and further away, we were surrounded by star encrusted darkness and it felt warm, safe and like we were floating.

We each got one wish and so in turn we silently wished, then waited as we were swept away to a distant planet.  Once on the planet, it was like we were waking up.  The first planet was a secluded beach.  Warm with gentle waves, so clean and so beautiful.

We walked hand in hand to a cave in the cliffs which was set up like the inside of a country cottage with a fire, which despite the warmth outside, was most welcome.  There was a grandfather clock ticking loudly and a bird which seemed to live in the room but had no cage - I think it was a Goldcrest. :) 

We sat and drank tea out of red woollen cups (?!) in front of the fire then ran out on to the beach hand in hand - we both seemed to be able to run without effort...it was more like flying really.  We ended up lying on the beach and then comes the X rated bit ;-)  I will leave that to your (I am sure more than adequate) imagination!

Afterwards, as we lay on the sand cuddled up together, we were suddenly sucked up into space again, floating past the moon (inexplicably there were a lot of crows flying around there).  

Once again then, we felt we were being taken to a different planet and we woke up inside an igloo but wrapped up warm in fur coats, hats and boots!  We went outside, once again hand in hand and it was as though we were in a huge factory made entirely of ice and snow with penguins waddling around making autumnal trees.  Although the trees were the right colour.....gorgeous golds and reds.....they were also made of ice and sparkled, making them even more beautiful than usual.

We both got in a boat that seemed to be on smooth water, although it was actually ice and we set sail out of the factory and on to a river which again.....felt like water but was in fact ice.  If you looked down you could see through the ice to a whole civilisation below where people, animals birds and fish all seemed to co-exist in the same environment.

There was enchanting music playing and I suddenly noticed that it was dark, we were in a forest of the beautiful sparkling, glowing autumn ice trees and we had a fire lit on the boat with us, keeping us warm as we snuggled together.

I often dream an emotion and can wake up crying or giggling my head off (shaking the bed sometimes), and at this point in the dream I felt the most incredible love, happiness and contentment.  We snuggled closer and closer, never feeling close enough.... before being sucked up again into space but this time we were tied to kitchen chairs and we got separated.  I watched Arty on his chair disappear further and further into the distance but I knew that there were lots of the magical sweets left in the bag so didn’t feel too sad as I understood there were more adventures to come.

My chair hurtled towards earth and I had that horrible lurching, falling feeling just before waking up!  

And that was my night - how was yours!? ;-)

Asda or Narnia?

It's been a while (again!), I know but I just feel the need to share this one. It's lurking in my brain ;-)

I was with a friend and we needed to get some shopping but she was scared to go in the Asda I took her to as she thought it would be full of 'unsavoury people'!

I told her that all shops were closing in 17 minutes so there was simply no time to prevaricate!

She kept stopping people to ask them if someone could be chavvy and gentle at the same time?  Everyone she asked just looked confused so I just said 'look....I'd shop there in the dark with two murderers on the loose.....now come on!!'

So we headed for the entrance but the security man was just locking up. It was ten minutes to closing time. I persuaded him to let us in though and he did. 

Once in, it turns out that the interior of the shop was a cross between narnia, a skating rink and the most beautiful architecture. 

The inside of the building was made up of the outside face of many wonderful distinctive and historic white buildings.  The ceiling was a breathtaking jumble of coloured and golden gleaming domes. 

The floor was a carpet of snow, covering hills and slopes but you could ice skate on it round and round the main circular route. As you skated, in the middle of the circle you would pass old hollow tree stumps and little caverns. These were the 'shelves' where the groceries were kept. 

As you whizzed around (with hand made, multi level, oak trollies), you grabbed the groceries. If you needed to ask where something was, a member of staff would sense it and pop up at just the right time. 

I remember asking for weetabix crunchy bran and BBQ beans! Hopefully not to eat together! ;-)

There were some annoying 'realistic' aspects to the dream.  A small child having a tantrum lying in everyone's way that we all had to jump over, being out of stock on my favourite things and an annoying woman that took everything off my trolley and ate my pork and apple bap because she 'thought I'd finished with it'!  Ok.....not sure that last bit was totally realistic ;-)

It was a race to the checkout caves where a mystery operative scanned my groceries in the dark (I seem to have lost the friend by now)! 

I was asked to guess the price and I correctly guessed 29 urkles and 14 shells!  My prize was a cloak and a key. I was given this by a mystery man who grabbed my hand as he handed them to me. He was shaking. He whispered in my ear..... 'soon' and I noticed his breath smelt of almonds. 

As I left I looked back and it was a regular Asda with glass frontage and the lights being switched off one by one. It started to rain so I hurried to pack up the shopping. The last thing I put in the car was the cloak and the key and I really felt so desperate to find out what they were for. 

I started the car and drove off. The radio came on. It was like the presenters were talking in usual tones as if they were speaking quite normally but every single word was 'soon'. This freaked me out so I switched channels.  The same!  I turned it off but it carried on!!

I panicked and crashed the car into a wall but I ended up the other side of it in a world where everyone wore cloaks and carried a key round their necks. 

And that....is all I can remember!! :-/

Hello again! :-)

Hello....it's been a while.  I HAVE had some cracking dreams, but last night was so mad and is still going round and round my head so I just had to record it.

I lived behind a magic shop and every day to get into my house I had to perform some sort of task.  On this particular day I had to tune in a miniature metal wind chime to the key of H!  Becci (one of the hairdressers I go to) was holding it and I had to tune each metal piece to fit in with the tones in a computer game her little boy was playing.

I managed this and got through to where Lauren and Jo (my friend and another hairdresser!) were taunting me with mirrors.  I wasn't sure which way was really there and which way was a reflection.  I eventually got through to outside where there was an outside shower cubicle at the end of the garden.  I went in but there was a dog having a shower and also an oven in my way.

I kept calling them to move the unwanted additions to my shower but I was locked in and had to work around them.  When I came out they laughed at me and threw giant pegs at me which left bruises.

I set off on my bike to go to Marloes or Pembrey.  I realised 5 minutes down the road that Marloes was well over an hour even in a car and thought better of it so I saw a roundabout up ahead and decided to cycle all the way around and head back home.

As I started to cycle home it was suddenly icy and my bike wheels couldn't get a grip.  I didn't fall off but I was skidding all over the place.  I noticed that Jeremy Clarkson and the others from Top Gear were stood on the pavement filming me and doing a running commentary of why they hated cyclists.

I got past that area and noticed that it was now hot and sunny.  Every now and again I would see a still, partially transparent image of my husband doing something........like a ghost of a snapshot in time.

If I tried to cycle past, I would end up getting stuck in loops of time so I realised I was actually in a computer game and I had to cycle through the images of my husband, smashing them.  I heard a dinging noise as I did so and I gained points and occasionally an extra life!

I eventually got to a farm where all the people and animals had faces of people I knew but not bodies to match.  I had to poke people I didn't like and caress those I did.  If I chose a bad person to like or a good person to dislike, I would lose a life.

I got into a field and it was a very romantic place with sunshine, butterflies and flowers.  I was walking hand in hand with someone who was singing to me and making me tingle like they were shooting waves of magic electricity through my body. I thought I had won the game, but then a bull suddenly charged at us and we had to run and run.

We came to a cliff top and had to stop, but the bull ran towards us so we joined hands, closed our eyes and jumped off!

Despite sounding a bit scary at the end I really enjoyed the whole dream, the feeling of playing a game, meeting challenges and even the danger involved!

Phew - I feel better for getting that one out of my system!

No details.....

But just a brief post to record that I dreamt about dreaming last night. This is very confusing!

Missing out!

God...you lot have missed some GREAT dreams ;-P

Summary

Dreamt I was being chased by a two headed, six foot kangaroo penguin.  Called George. There was also attack mould, strawberry chocolate evil and a nice dovecote.

So. Not a blog but a summary. The attack mould was really scary. It merged humans.

An Island retreat...

I think what I will do is post less often - maybe when I think it's a particularly good dream or at least one I might like to record ;-)

I did say however that I would post today's, so being a woman of my word, here it is - not overly long, which is no bad thing at all!

Myself, my husband and my parents were living on a cliff-top island.  We had a dining table out in the middle of nowhere, near the cliff edge and were sitting eating.

It suddenly started to go grey, misty and wet and a friend arrived in her car (not sure how, on an island but that's the least of my worries with some of my dreams)!!

Anyway we all rushed in to the house and stood looking out of rather lovely grand windows, all we could see was murky grey and all we could hear was the wind and the crashing waves.

Next day I woke up to find my friend had already gone out.  She had woken up and had only then realised, what an amazing stunningly beautiful place she had come to.  The sky was blue, the sea a most amazing turquoise and there was no one else about.  I could see her down on the beach running into the sea and laughing and it made me feel happy.

I noticed that she had attached a cork tile to the sky and nailed her toothbrush and toothpaste to the underside of it (as you do)!

Just then we suddenly had an earthquake and huge cracks appeared beneath our feet.  We all ran screaming and ended up in a village full of Victorian houses.

All the residents were complaining about the damage and blaming us, as we had built the houses!  I said that we certainly didn't as they were over 100 years old, but they said the former owner of our house HAD, so it amounted to the same thing!

They would not see sense and all had huge buckets of black tar, telling us that we needed to use it to glue their houses back together.

We gave in and started to fill all the cracks with tar.

And I am afraid the ending is no more exciting than that :(

But feel free to make something up....maybe in one of the houses there was an orgy going on and we all joined in!  ;-)

Winding down...

I'll record last night's dream here later, but I'll wind this down soon.

I know that some used to read and stopped, some (I think) have a brief look out of obligation.....to be nice :-) Those who do read it still, I am sure will get bored of it soon enough ;-)

I don't look back at them as often as I used to myself even, so I'm sure my time would be better spent doing something else. Everything ends. Whether you want it to or not...so soon I think it'll be time to leave the dreams behind and concentrate more on real life. Whatever that is! ;-)

An audio abduction!

As a one off silly thing to do I have done an audio version of my dream!  You SHOULD (if I do it correctly) find it right at the bottom of this page, near the list of previous posts!  

If SOMEONE could let me know if it works I would be most grateful! :-)

Last night's dream started with myself, my husband and my father sitting round a dining room table somewhere, discussing our plans to set up our own business 'doing accents'! (?)   I should add none of us can actually do accents!

Anyway we ran out of biscuits - a clear disaster in anyone's book I am sure so I set off to the local supermarket to get some.

Once there I bumped into a girl who looked stressed as she desperately needed 12 sachets of low fat hot chocolate and they only had 9.  She looked like her world was coming to an end and  asked me when they refilled the shelves and I confidentially answered 3am!

She nodded and at that moment a bloke appeared, and led her away roughly by the arm.  As I left the supermarket she was stood by a wall crying so I stopped to check she was OK.  She said yes, but  then ran off and I could see her join a group of people up ahead.

As I caught up with them I could hear that they were all talking in rhyme and that everything they said was really funny.  They were all absolutely rocking with laughter so I carried on my way feeling glad she was OK.

I walked to the bus stop and I was surprised to realise that I was waiting for a bus.  I don't quite know why this surprised me, but it did.  The bus arrived, we all got on and as soon as we were on, the driver said he was from Somalia and was abducting us all.  He said we could keep our phones but were not under any circumstances allowed to use them.

It all felt very real and very frightening and my first instinct was to do a surreptitious text to my husband to say 'help I am being abducted'.  Something told me that I would regret it if I did though, so I tucked my phone into my bra and just decided to wait to see what happened and to try to stay calm.

The girl next to me however did try to send a text.  The Abductor was outside and she felt safe, but as soon as she did, he was instantly next to her and crushed the phone in her hand.  He dragged her off and we didn't see her again.

He drove us off somewhere, but then stopped at a bus stop and three blokes got on.  When they realised what was happening they tried to attack the abductor but he had no problem in overpowering all of them.  He threw them off the moving bus...without opening the doors first. 

We ended up on an old industrial estate.  There were just three women left on the bus now.  The other two were hugging each other and crying but for some reason I still felt calm.  He got us all off the bus and took us into an old school.

I received a text on my phone.  I checked, but the abductor was preoccupied so I had a sneaky look.  The text turned into a piece of folded up paper in my hand.

With one last check to make sure he wasn't looking, I glanced at it.  It said 'remember Molly (one of our rabbits!) needs identification so she can get a passport'!  

I was still looking at this when the abductor suddenly banged sharply on the window and made me jump.  He beckoned to me to come outside and I panicked thinking that I was in trouble.  

Once outside he told me I wasn't dressed correctly and that he had wanted all of us outside not just me, as he was taking us for a meal.

I noticed I had pink silk pyjamas on which surprised me, so I headed back in and we all had a frantic search for decent clothes.  I found a black outfit which was covered in white mould.

He seemed happy enough though and gave us all a very long slice of brown bread and a brick of corned beef each (!)

After this 'meal' we were ushered back in and I noticed a small toy on one of the desks.  It was a cross between a car and a helicopter and it looked like it had been dipped in gold paint.  I found that if you repeatedly pulled it backwards, it would zip off forwards.  I did this but after 'driving' forward a bit, it took off into the air as the helicopter function took over!

It flew around a bit then crashed and fell behind a cupboard.  I went to pick it up and it started to talk to me! It was very upset that someone had left it behind, choosing instead to play with its predecessor, the mark II which couldn't even fly!

It was MOST upset and put out about it   

The abductor came in and said he didn't know what to do now, as he hadn't really thought it through!  He asked us, if he got us all an ice cream, would we just call it quits and forget about it, so I said yes please, took the ice cream and walked home!

Alphabet strangeness and mini madness

Well last night's adventure started with me mowing the lawns but everywhere I'd mown had turned cream :-/ 

When I got to the bit of lawn behind the sheds, I suddenly got hit on the head by the letter Y. I suddenly realised that RT and an old friend were fighting, by standing as far away from each other as they could and throwing giant letters at each other. 

Also they were both in fancy dress. :-/

I asked what on earth they were doing and they both stopped and stared at me as if I'd just asked the most peculiar question ever. 

They both said in unison 'a b c d e f g' then got back to fighting. I shrugged and tried to carry on mowing but the mower had disappeared. 

I decided to move some logs instead but for some reason I was moving them by standing over them, legs apart, crouching down and using my inner thighs to roll the logs by swaying my hips side to side!

Suddenly my friend had a huge X sticking out of his chest. He'd been hit. RT was most upset saying it was only meant to be a game. 

RT and I bundled the friend into the back of my mini and set off for hospital but my mini only had three wheels so it was a bumpy ride!

Suddenly we were all out of the car and I was driving it by remote control! It swerved, went through a hedge and I somehow managed to drive it UNDER a blue Volvo! 

The people in the house came out and the owner of the Volvo didn't seem too annoyed. He just tutted and went back in. 

My mini was pulled out and had no roof. I thought about just carrying on driving it as an open top sports mini, but before I could decide, an insurance man popped up next to me. 

He said my insurance would cover repairs to both cars but my mini would have to be taken away now and sit in the waiting room. 

I asked why it couldn't wait at my house and the insurance man looked very shifty and kept looking over to the people from the house who also looked shifty. 

I got very suspicious and put the mini, RT and the other friend into a wooden cart (don't ask me how!) jumped on a horse and rode away pulling the cart behind me! 

There was then a boring bit about writing reports up at work but the horse bit is a better ending ;-)